Why Am I Scared To Hack Alone When I'm Perfectly Confident In The Arena?

You can have a brilliant lesson. Your horse goes beautifully, you feel completely in control and there's not a hint of anxiety. You finish feeling pleased with yourself and wondering why you ever questioned your riding.

But suggest going for a hack on your own and suddenly everything changes. You start thinking about what might happen. What if your horse spooks? What if you meet a tractor? What if something goes wrong and there's nobody there to help?

Before you've even put your foot in the stirrup, your stomach is churning, your heart is racing and you're beginning to find perfectly reasonable excuses not to go.

Perhaps the weather isn't quite right. Perhaps your horse seems a bit fresh. Perhaps tomorrow would be better.

And the frustrating thing is that you know perfectly well you can ride.

SO WHY DOES HACKING ALONE FEEL SO DIFFERENT?

The answer has much more to do with how your brain predicts danger than with your ability as a rider. When you're riding in an arena, you're in a relatively controlled environment. There are boundaries, familiar surroundings and usually somebody nearby. If you're having a lesson, there's an instructor making some of the decisions and providing reassurance simply by being there. Your brain has learned to associate that environment with a degree of predictability and safety.

Now think about what changes when you hack alone. You're responsible for every decision. The environment is less predictable. Other horses, vehicles, wildlife, dogs and whatever might be lurking around the next corner are all outside your control. And there's nobody immediately available to help if something goes wrong.

For some riders, the brain interprets that increased uncertainty as a threat, even when they have the experience and ability to deal with perfectly ordinary situations. Your brain is constantly making predictions about what is likely to happen next, using previous experiences, current circumstances and what it has learned to associate with danger. If it predicts that hacking alone could be unsafe, it can initiate a protective response before you've consciously had time to assess the situation. That's why you can know you're capable and still experience very real fear.

WHY DOES HACKING WITH SOMEBODY ELSE NOT SOLVE THE PROBLEM?

I frequently see advice suggesting that nervous riders should go out with a friend until their confidence improves. And there's nothing wrong with enjoying a hack in company. It can be enormous fun, and for some riders, gradually gaining experience in a supportive environment is exactly what's needed.

But it doesn't always address the reason they're frightened of going alone. If your brain has learned that you're safe because somebody else is there, then every successful hack in company can reinforce that particular prediction. You got home safely, yes. But your brain may attribute that safety to the presence of your companion. Take the companion away and the original prediction hasn't necessarily changed. This is why someone can spend months hacking with friends, enjoying every minute, and still feel physically sick at the prospect of going out alone.

The problem isn't necessarily insufficient experience. It's what the brain has learned to expect in the absence of reassurance.

AND SOMETIMES NOTHING BAD HAS EVER HAPPENED

People often assume that riding anxiety must have been caused by a fall, an accident or some particularly frightening experience. Sometimes it has. But sometimes there's no obvious incident whatsoever.

I've worked with riders who have spent decades doing things quite happily and then, seemingly out of nowhere, found themselves frightened of situations they previously wouldn't have given a second thought.

Changes in responsibility, stress, confidence in other areas of life, hormonal changes or simply an accumulation of experiences can alter how the brain assesses risk.

You don't necessarily have to experience something frightening for your brain to begin anticipating that something frightening might happen. And once that prediction becomes established, the physical response can be remarkably convincing.

Your breathing changes. Your muscles tighten. You become hyperaware of every movement your horse makes. You might shorten your reins, hold your breath or begin anticipating a spook long before your horse has shown any sign of one. And of course, horses are sensitive to changes in the way we ride them, and that tension can sometimes create exactly the sort of difficulties we were hoping to avoid.

WHY MORE HACKING ISN'T ALWAYS THE ANSWER

This is an important fact.

If you're riding an inexperienced horse that genuinely isn't safe in traffic, or attempting something beyond your present ability, then caution is entirely appropriate. Horse and rider preparation, sensible training and good judgement matter.

But what about the capable rider on a suitable horse, taking a familiar route, whose body still reacts as though disaster is imminent?

Repeatedly putting yourself through an experience while frightened doesn't automatically teach your brain that the situation is safe. You might complete the hack successfully but spend the entire ride braced, checking for danger and desperately hoping nothing happens. The relief when you get home can be enormous. And next time, the same anxiety appears because your brain hasn't necessarily learned that hacking alone is safe. It may have learned that being on high alert was part of what got you home safely.

This is why telling somebody to be brave, think positively or just get more miles under their belt can be so frustrating. They may already be doing all those things, but the anxiety doesn't go away.

CHANGING THE RESPONSE WITH BWRT

BrainWorking Recursive Therapy (BWRT®) approaches this problem differently. Rather than concentrating on helping somebody tolerate the anxiety once it has appeared, BWRT works with the part of the brain that produces it.

The process identifies the particular triggers and the response the brain has learned to generate. Using a structured process, we work to replace that unwanted response with one more appropriate to the circumstances. The intention is that the brain no longer produces the same inappropriate fear response when the rider encounters the situation.

It isn't hypnosis, and it doesn't require somebody to repeatedly relive frightening experiences or spend hours analysing why they feel the way they do. It's about changing an automatic pattern, rather than simply learning to cope with its consequences.

As a former elite equestrian competitor who subsequently experienced a significant loss of riding confidence myself, I understand just how infuriating it is to be frightened of something you know you can do. I also know that being a better rider isn't necessarily the answer.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO HACK ALONE. BUT YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO CHOOSE.

Some riders genuinely prefer riding in company, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Nobody needs to prove their ability by hacking alone. But if you would love to be able to saddle up, leave the yard and enjoy some peaceful time with your horse without having to negotiate with your own fear first, that's rather different.

You should be making that choice because it's what you want to do, not because your brain has decided you must avoid it. And an automatic response that has been learned can potentially be changed. If riding anxiety has started dictating what you can and cannot enjoy, you can read more about my specialist rider confidence work.

Begin with a conversation. An initial online consultation gives us the opportunity to discuss what's happening, what you'd like to change and whether BWRT is appropriate for you. The consultation fee of £20 i

s redeemable against your first therapy session if you decide to proceed.

Kate Osmaston — Registered BWRT® Advanced Practitioner, former elite equestrian competitor and specialist in rider confidence and performance.